Unimpressed with un-petroleum

Petrolatum and mineral oil are two ingredients you want to try and avoid in all your beauty products, but unfortunately they're in something like one out of every ten or fifteen cosmetic products on the market. Like many consumers, lately I have been trying out more "natural" or "organic" products as a healthy alternative to petroleum-derived products.

I use quotation marks here because there really is no such thing as a natural or organic cosmetic. The words are just marketing terms some companies use--ethically or unethically--on their labels. These terms are not monitored by the FDA like food is because, well, the FDA doesn't regulate cosmetics.

Regardless, petroleum jelly or Vaseline is a staple that you can find in almost every American household and for good reason. Though sticky and occlusive, it is a universal salve often used as a moisturizer or chapped skin. No other balm on the market has successfully usurped Vaseline in this manner. I myself have found myself reaching for it again and again this winter for chapped lips and cracked hands.

I decided to change this habit and found myself in the beauty section of my local Whole Foods where I saw a product that looked like the miracle product I'd been waiting for. Alba un-petroleum Multi-Purpose Jelly. It was around $6 for 3.5 ounces, packaged in a squeezable tube, which is more expensive than Vaseline but relatively cheap compared to other natural skincare products on the market. (Part of the reason petroleum products are so frequently used is because they're so inexpensive.) There were few ingredients: castor oil, coconut oil, beeswax, and Vitamin E. There were no testers available for this product, so I purchased the product blindly.

I hate this product. I never say that. I always try to find some way to make a product useful. But really, I hate this product. And apparently I'm alone in this because sales for un-petroleum are skyrocketing since last year and getting rave reviews. In fact, I could not find one negative review on it. The closest I got was written by a girl who said she didn't really know how she was planning to use it because she has oily skin and doesn't need something this moisturizing.

I still hate this product. It's slimy. It doesn't spread evenly. It won't cling to dry patches and instead runs onto oilier or moist areas that need it. I woke up one morning after using it as a lip balm to find that not only were my lips still chapped (more than before, actually) but the product had seeped into my mouth and covered my gums. the inside of my lips. (That's not normal.) I tried using it as an eye makeup remover, then spent literally twenty-four minutes trying to remove the product, which didn't come off until my shower the next day. I have dry skin that's been clear for years until this product somehow migrated off my lips and onto my face with a mission to seek and destroy. Even on my scaly hands and feet, it sat on my flesh like cling wrap, doing nothing but making everything I touched disgusting. I hate this product. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it.

How this product become so popular? It all started a year ago when celebrity makeup artist Kandee Johnson posted a video about her skincare routine on her YouTube channel. If you haven't already seen it or any of Kandee's video, check it out below:

I love this girl to death, and I'm not alone. Her videos are not only informative, but her enthusiasm for life (and makeup) is absolutely addictive. And I agree with her on almost everything. When I first started watching her videos (recommended to me by a client), I was floored that there was someone else out there who loved the same products I do. (Actually the MyChelle Fruit Enzyme she mentions in the beginning is my daily cleanser. If you're interested in trying it, know that it is a glycolic acid cleanser and will double as an exfoliator.)

I don't want to say Kandee talked me into buying the un-petroleum. I was looking for a product like this anyway. And like I said, this video's a year old, and she's posted a new skincare video since then. But I do know that almost every review I've read of this product cites her as the driving force behind their purchasing decision. Kandee is like an alchemist when it comes to beauty products. Anything she mentions turns to gold.

I hate to say anything negative about Ms. Johnson because I really find her to be the smartest and most talented guru on YouTube. But when I rewatched this video, I realized that we were all buying un-petroleum for the wrong reasons.

Kandee may have beautiful skin, but her reasoning for using un-petroleum doesn't make any sense. There are no products on the market that seal in your moisturizer. (The closest thing I can think of is Clinique Moisture Surge, an aloe-based product for those with an impaired moisture barrier.) If your moisturizer isn't adequately hydrating your skin, suffocating it with occlusive products (natural or synthetic) is crazy talk. Your moisturizer, unless prescription, is a cosmetic and can't (by order of the law) penetrate your skin enough to structurally change it, so you're just piling on layers of oil upon oil onto your skin and clogging your pores in the process. Many experts, like Dr. Hauschka,even believe that using night creams alone--without an added "sealant"--is bad for the skin, which needs to breath and repair itself while you're sleeping. Un-petroleum applied on top of moisturizer will probably end up doing you more harm than good in the long run, even if you are seeing good results now.

Kandee is flat-out wrong when she says natural ingredients can't make you break out. Any imbalance of oil and water in your skin will result in blemishes, and furthermore, coconut oil is a saturated fat. And saturated fats, like lanolin which comes from sheep's fat, is too heavy for most skin types, except the very, very dry. I'm talking exposed to radiation, lizard dry.

Lastly, moisturizer will not repair wrinkles. Wrinkles come from a breakdown of collagen and elastin, not dehydration. Yes, dehydration will make wrinkles more apparent, but oil alone is not an anti-aging ingredient.

If you find that moisturizer alone isn't satisfying your dry skin, then I have a few alternatives to slathering yourself in this junk:

• Get a different moisturizer. The one you're using isn't emollient enough.
• Exfoliate more often. You may have a build up of dead skin that is keeping your moisturizer from doing it's job. There are a lot of great physical and chemical exfoliators on the market. Or you can mix plain old sugar (white or brown) into your cleanser until it has a grainy consistency. Wash your face as usual with the sugar cleanser, then rinse with warm water. Afterward, you can splash your face once with cold water to close pores.
• Use a serum under your moisturizer that contains a humectant like hyaluronic acid. Hyaluronic acid is produced naturally by your body, so it works on both oily and dry skins. I suggest Estee Lauder Advanced Night Repair, but there are natural products on the market that use this technology as well. In fact, I believe MyChelle Dermaceuticals makes one.
• Try spot treating dry areas with a light oil. Jojoba oil is gentle and noncomedogenic. Many claim that it is the closest oil to our natural sebum, making it the most recognizable to our skins. Drier skins might even want to try shea butter before turning to coconut oil.
• Use a moisturizing mask once a week. For a full facial experience, boil some water with a few drops of the essential oil of your choice and steam for ten minutes before exfoliating with a gentle scrub. Once your pores have been opened and cleansed, you can apply the mask and sit back for ten or fifteen minutes before rubbing in or rinsing off. (Which technique to use will be specified on your product's label.

As I post this, I would like to say that I hope this review is helpful to people. I do not mean any disrespect to Kandee. But as a dissatisfied customer and a product reviewer, I couldn't stifle the urge to voice my dissenting opinion on un-petroleum. Feel free to disagree with me. In fact, I would love to hear anyone's comments on their experience with this product.